01 February 2008

Cuckoo for 'Chu

Pikachu is on the loose
We smashed his bros., we dished abuse
But how could we alone deduce:
Those icons we flicked with panicked clicks
An electric mouse would on us afflict?
"Can't read Japanese," our excuse

With strippled fur and reddened cheek
He disappeared, a yellow streak
We tailed his tail and women's shrieks
Down the hall, that little puffball
A dash, a bawl, a frantic crawl
He disappeared, that little sneak

As daily holes in drywall attest
Our Japanese visitor is quite the pest
No wire or current can he not ingest
Make the blunder of catching his plunder
He'll squeak PIK-A-CHU! and call down the thunder
"I told you he's cheap," Gerald says

Small as a basketball, fast as a jet,
Fury erupts when he takes down the 'net!
We stationed some guards on every outlet
"What's the plan for this beast from Japan?"
RTFM: no man can
Not knowing kanji we came to regret

In desperation today I brought out a box
With forked stick and string, I hoped to outfox
That cunning rodent and giver of shocks
The dubious mandate to locate some bait
Culminated in several car batteries (eight)
But at current DC the little rat balks

I'm forced to ask you for help with our curse:
How can we capture, expel or coerce
This discharging rodent and subject of verse?
As I type this he's tread on top of my head
Hairs on my neck spike with current and dread
We freed Diddy Kong... but he's worse.

By Dave "Fargo" Kosak. Originally on GameSpy.
Image from GameSpy.

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